The Object of Pursuit

What is it that sets my soul alight?

For a long time the answer has been weaving. Its always a sign of a new phase being reached when it becomes hard to recall the exact attraction to that which has so enraptured one for so long.
I guess that a big part of the weaving is its mythological power. The way that the language of weaving is so inextricably interwoven with human language, across cultures and time. You would honestly be amazed at how many common phrases and words speak directly to the activity. And more than that the myth of the activity itself, the weaving together of worlds, of the universe itself. The notion of creation from nothing, the bringing into being, the creative act itself and the deep relationship to the feminine.

When I began on my path of weaving, it was a physical activity but more than that it was philosophical.

A quick definition of Philosophy : 1. (mass noun)the study of the fundamental nature of knowledge, reality, and existence, especially when considered as an academic discipline.

I became enrapt with weaving after spending the better part of a year in India exploring, researching & recording my adventures through the land and its multitude of textile traditions. The thing that really caught me was cloth as a medium to connect people to land and to one another. In India the cloth produced speaks directly to the land, both in the raw material from which it is produced, the apparatus through which it is transformed & the way that the cloth seems to so perfectly address the needs of the wearer in direct relation to the climate. It seems a perfect ecosystem, which in turn signifies to others the exact locality of a people based on their attire. It is such an excellent and elegant system of cultivation, production & use which stands in such vast paradox to the status quo of manufacture, production & consumption in our contemporary age.

The idea that fabric could be produced in such an earthly manner, slowly & intentionally made and consumed was an absolute inspiration to me, one that I tried to replicate in my local context. The truth is, as long as I lived in a very small perception of what my life could be, it worked. I was able to produce functional cloth locally, by hand, using locally sourced natural fibres and production practices which were low energy use and low environmental impact. It is a beautiful thing which I am honestly very proud of. But as the story goes, the entrepreneurial path is truly one of self development and as I interrogate my internal patterns, my fear, all the ways in which I have kept myself small, I have began to expand my imagination and the potential to really dance in abundance with reality. This expansion requires constant transformation, a continual cycle of approaching uncomfortable edges and learning to move through them with trust and grace, by which I mean doing so well maintaining emotional & nervous system regulation.

The truth is that I am entering a new chapter for which I really have no framework. I’m not sure what this writing is in service of other than the activity of writing in itself. This reminds me of the definition of play, which, fittingly the presence of which is a metric by which I like to rate the success of my path. I have ideas, musings and a deep quest for meaning and understanding as well as a desire to share and converse, so here I am beginning the practice of doing so. I have some big thoughts about the state of the world, about our role in it as humans collectively and individually. In the past months I have gained great growth, security & joy from developing a meditation practice and a deep enqiury into non dual spirituality & philosophy. The truth is that I am an artist. I have always been so, and being in silent communion with material & creation is ultimately my souls happiest place. But I also know that this path is a solitary one, at least for me, and that it is through connection that the depth of the human experience is truly expressed and relished in. The desire for intellectual stimulation has drawn me many times to study further and as an artist the only option which would come to mind is Fine Art. I’ve really been on a journey of connecting to my intuition and my internal compass of desire, of joy, and in looking to this curriculum I’ve been overwhelmed by a sense of contraction, a darkness like a cloud or as if climbing down into a basement, the prospect felt dark, cold, isolated.

When feeling understimulated and the desire for research rigour, my first port of call is often art, other artists, art history. This inspires me to get back to the making, but has not been as intellectually stimulating as my explorations into spirituality, philosophy, mythology and their underlying interrelation as well as a deep understanding of the relationship of all things that this path points to. This leads me to feel that perhaps the art is the medium through which the message is conveyed, and in an attempt to gain true understanding, true experience, one must look beyond the hand that points and to that to which it points towards.

I would like my art practice to be a deep exploration and interrogation of what it means to truly be in this world.
What does it mean to be a human, in this time, in this body, in this mind.
How do we relate to ourselves, our stories, our emotions
How do we relate to our communities, how do we serve, what do we contribute.
how do we relate to our environment?
how do we tend, to ourselves, one another and all that we co create our ecosystem with.

I’ve noticed recently the development of my deep attraction to health, to vitality, to ease & joy.
I would like to live in service of this, to contribute health to the system, to develop ways of making, of being which is deeply supportive, which does not negate suffering and the harsh realities of the world but choose simply to focus all attention on and nourish only that which brings wellbeing, peace and happiness.

This is my manifesto, to which I dedicate myself, guided by gentle intuition and steadfast devotion.